A Tie Maker #CWC2011

The infamous cricket World Cup has already begun and it will be a real sin from my side to not write about it. I could have probably controlled this temptation for a maximum of one more week but after yesterday's Ind vs Eng match in Bengaluru, I reached the tipping point. The satisfaction of writing this post is similar to that of holding it in for 5 hours on an uncomfortable bus journey after downing 4 pints and finally taking a leak in your own toilet, thus admiring the beauty of natural phenomenon.

After some really boring games at the #CWC2011, yesterday's game turned out to be one of the best games among all of the WorldCups. Not just because of the runs scored or the domino like batting collapse or the result of the game, but also because of the controversial UDRS. This match thoroughly emphasized the fact that cricket is a team game and just individual contributions aren't enough( I forbid Ravi Shastri from copying this line as its is copyrighted under my name). 

The top order from both the teams set up the match beautifully but the middle and the lower orders made sure that there were enough twists in the tale, ultimately ensuring that the end would sound like a story from one of the moral science books. Tendulkar was cautious to begin with but paced his innings in a classy manner to get his 47th ODI hundred, thus crawling close to that 50 mark. Strauss's innings was nothing short of brilliance as he made all the Indian bowlers beg for mercy. He got every bowler into his favorite position as he slowly and steadily, with the use of a lubricant did them where it hurts the most, thus disfiguring their figures.

More than 675 runs were scored for the loss of 18 wickets totally. The UDRS seems to be the most complicated system used to make things simpler, thus making the situation even more complicated. It is like giving a student tips on cracking an exam and giving him a book also on how to crack these tips but restricting him from using not more than 3 tips. If it looks like LBW, if the Hawkeye says it is LBW, then raise that crooked finger. I really couldn't get my head around that 2.5m clause in the rule. In that case, KP(Pietersen) who bats couple of feet outside the crease can never be judged out LBW if he is playing on his front foot. We shouldn't be surprised to see a "LBW factor" coming into play, based on the length of the batsman's stride, his height, weight, Zodiac sign, skin tone, sexual orientation, no of previous partners, no of followers on Twitter, and finally if the ball is actually hitting him in line and going on to hit the stumps.

While both teams deserved to win, they equally deserved to loose. No doubt, there were some nail biting, heart pounding and nerve crunching moments which made up for the fabulous game of cricket, but both teams walked out after breaking even. A tie at the end looked like a fitting result. I never thought I would say this, but Ravi Shastri's typical dialogue, "At the end of the day, cricket was the winner" actually is apt for this situation. But it surely wasn't when South Africa chased down 434 against Australia and definitely not when India won the T20 match against Pakistan in a bowl out. I surely missed watching this game in the stadium, as it would have easily gone down as one of those "I was there" moments.

P.S - Can someone please tell Yeddy that the victory symbol that he uses irrespective of the situation(even in a tied game) is not the same as \m/ .

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Conning The Consumer

Heyyy, its the holiday season or  its the winter collection or its the summer sale or the end of season sale. If it cant be somehow stuffed into these seasons, then its definitely the clearance sale. The fashion and numerous other FMCG retailers have the best knowledge of the seasons and the climatic conditions. Probably even better than the meteorological department itself. No wonder they plan months ahead and invariably manage to come up with a collection or product range apt for the season in an effort to lead you right into the jaws of the most legal con job.

Yes....Yesssss..I'm not being cynical and I'm definitely not going to hold placards and make noise outside any outlet tomorrow. Lets face it. How many times have you actually gone out for shopping having a list of N things in mind and come back home with N+X things, leaving you a lot less richer at the end of the day. I must confess that I have succumbed to this and am trying really hard to not get seduced. This shopping and buying frenzy has been known to be more addictive than alcohol (assuming that you don't shop for booze every time).

People sometimes stereotype women to be more of those kind of shopping addicts and men to be the ones with supernatural control over all those cravings. It is a fact that women accessorize a lot, but for the kind of limited options that men have, relatively speaking we men have the tendency to get addicted to material pleasures more than women. Keeping these things aside, the retailers are on a mission to play a harmony with our nerves. Whether its the 2 for 1 or buy 1 get 1 or buy now, pay later or 75% off (with 'upto' written in size 2 Arial), all these weapons are intended to burn a hole in your pocket.

Retailers like Primark, Westside, Shoppers Stop no doubt have a decent collection at more than reasonable prices, but their main aim is to tempt you into buying 2 pairs of jeans when you need only 1, 4 T-Shirts when you need only 2, a pack of socks when you don't need one and half a dozen underwears when you still don't have any holes in your current ones. While the profit margin on every item is less compared to the other big guns, their business is dependent on high volume of sales. As long as they can make you spend more than what you had in mind, it is as good as making you eat the forbidden fruit. At times, the temptation might seem like Megan Fox(too hard to resist) and or like Keira Knightley(luring) or like Aishwarya Rai(last resort, considering her current looks). Whatever might be your flavor, you are always being seduced and its a con job that the retailers have perfected.

As consumers, we really cant behave like hermits and ignore all the goodies out there. However, these are my tips to help you curtail your inner addiction. Always make sure than you carry cash while you shop in the supermarket. Only enough cash to get you through but not go berserk. Never use the big trolleys, try to use the baskets as much as possible. You have no idea how many less items you will drop into the basket as the load on your wallet will be directly reflecting on your hands. Always shop for your spouse. This way, your gifts always make it special to them and you'll also manage to spend the right amount so that you don't have to skip a few meals. 

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Valentine's day special - Love maadi nodu

Lock your wallets. Freeze your bank accounts. Stay at home. Follow these suggestions and you'll not be asking your friend to loan you money at the end of this month, even though it has just 28 days. Well its February and its Valentine's day and what more can you expect. Its that one day of the year when the world looks like what Anil Kapoor saw in Mr.India. Red, red and more red. There are red roses, red balloons, red cherries, red lipsticks, red wines and in some cases red blood.

Frankly speaking, the last one comes closest to personifying Valentine's day, after all the so called St.Valentine was beheaded on this day. In the golden words of Sheldon Cooper, "Given that St.Valentine was a 3rd century Roman priest, who was stoned and beheaded, wouldn't a more appropriate celebration of the evening be taking one steady gal to witness a brutal murder?" I totally disagree with what he says, after all where can one get volunteers nowadays who give their consent to getting beheaded in front of a crowd :-P.

I truly believe that this is one event that has been commercially milked in the perfect manner. Nobody cares about who is falling in love with whom or which girl slapped which guy or who jumped off a building as a result of a failed proposal. Hallmark and Archies are hellbent on selling more cards and teddy bears compared to the previous year. Restaurants are focused on increasing their profits by coming up with competing promotions. Ann Summers is well...., doing what they have been doing and they know for a fact that their sales are going to go up. The Bajrang Dals and Ram Senas are going to get all the unwanted media attention as a result of their stale hypocritic culture nonsense. At the end of the day, the businesses have made money, the guys(mostly) have seen a steep drop in their bank balance, some couples are happy and some couples have well, become singles.

I still remember those days during school, when we used to eagerly wait for this day. Not because I wanted to propose to a girl and definitely not because I was hoping for some girl to come and ask me out ( I was secretly hoping for that, but damn...!! Not even once). It used to be fun to see guys doing things that were totally unnatural of themselves. While a guy used to wait for the "love of his life" with a bunch of roses, there used to be numerous other girls who would avoid this guy, even though they secretly wanted atleast him to ask them out. Ultimately, that girl would come out and the guy who had rehearsed his dialogues the previous night would be dumbstruck and carry a sore face. Why? Most of the time, the girl would have her hands full of roses, chocolates and teddy bears and would be falling in love with all the attention. The irony is this most wanted girl too will have a crush on some other guy or in some cases even a girl but will be too timid to actually say it.

The only thing I would like to say is that you don't need a separate day to show your love and express it. Shower your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife with unconditional love and most importantly love them for what they are and not what you want them to be.

P.S - I miss my Valentine dearly, and not because it is the 14th of February.

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Fight or Flight Response

Imagine walking on the road late in the night and you happen to bump into a couple of drunks. As expected they start talking nonsense and start abusing you. You are alone and do not see any other soul nearby. Watcha gona do? You can either run away from there hoping that you'll not run into a similar situation or you can play the Rocky soundtrack in your head and throw a couple of punches at them. Don't worry the drunkards will have a higher probability of punching a tree than you, considering their balanced state.

The former response is called as flight and the latter is called as fight. The fight or flight response is common among animals and humans when they are under stress. If at all a deer is attacked by a lion, it runs and thus opts for flight. Rats tend to respond in a similar manner when attacked but throw a fight when they are cornered. We all have experienced these scenarios and generally speaking males tend to opt for fight and females tend to flee when confronted in certain situations.

Now lets apply this theory to our day to day lives. You have a manager who constantly criticizes you or overloads your schedule with unwanted or his share of work. What do you do? My solution would be to fight. When I mean fight, I'm not suggesting one to scream or abuse the manager let alone kicking him in the groin area. A fight here can be looked at channeling your aggression to get the work done and increase your productivity thus filtering out your anger. If one decides to flee in this situation by getting depressed or having those Monday morning blues throughout Monday and for the rest of the week, it not only undermines your potential but also makes you a bouncing board for your manager's self satisfying releases.

These reactions can have a resounding effect on a team. The attitude of one person in team can have a cascading effect on others. Back in the 1980s and 1990s, the Indian cricket team was known for playing cricket matches overseas just for the sake of formality. They had convinced themselves that they couldn't win a series overseas and would just go and play to help the BCCI make some money. But look at the situation now. There have been numerous records broken in the past few years and some of the senior players and even tailenders in the team have shown a lot of resilience. VVS Laxman's fighting spirit and classy knocks have made the team believe that they can win even after following on and even when they are 8 down. This is just one of the many examples that show how the responsive actions can impact the overall attitude of a team.

Not all the time does the fighting instinct help you. There are situations when the best option is to flee and not look back.  Yasi the cyclone that has lead to mass destruction in Australia, is a prime example. Whether it is the Yasi or Katrina or something as a big as the Tsunami, your best option is to flee.

We humans exhibit these kind of responses in numerous situations in our daily lives. While it all boils down to choosing flight or fight, what can cause more damage is the tendency to choose  the same option everytime. I guess Yeddy is a classic example of a guy opting to flee whenever he is under stress. He spent more time in the temples and donating millions of the tax payers' money to them when he was needed in the office. Now that his chair is became weak, he flew to the banks of a river to please the gods with his striptease.

P.S - Just a dozen more days to go, have to see which team will fight and eventually take the Udaan with the ICC cricket WorldCup.

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