Yeddy, the Clown, the Comedian, (-) the CM

Staying overseas, I think its safe to say that the social networking sites have helped me to keep myself abreast with everything happening back home. Most of the times, a gentle glance at my Twitter stream is as good as reading newspaper headlines. Yes, a Twitter addiction actually helps. 

Amidst all the fast till death and cricket, the political drama has actually been quite amusing to follow. I've never been a fan about politics and would always have a grumpy face whenever my dad or grandpa tuned into news channels every hour. In fact, they should probably get smart phones and start tweeting.

The political drama in Karnataka is definitely more entertaining than any of the states. People might argue that TN has always been on top, but then again it features the same old star cast, with the same story line and with the same ending. It sure is too predictable. The reason why Karnataka produced a blockbuster this time is because of the awesome character of Yeddy. Ever since he was sworn in, we have seen more drama than a reality show with all possible twists. Makers like Raghu , Rajiv and co should surely hook up with Yeddy sometime for inspiration.

I still remember during his beginning days, Yeddy was actually urging people to stop drinking alcohol and instead start drinking milk. Well, that was how he actually justified the rise in milk prices. Imagine that situation in which a bunch of guys decide to go to their favorite hang out place or a friend's place to party and you have all the usual sides, but see people saying "maga 60 semi skimmed hako", to which the other guy would reply "lo, sukka hodibeda. Atleast fully skimmed hodi".

When Yeddy started spending more time claiming his strength in front of the governor  rather in front of his wife, it was clear to even a layman that his attempts were lame. It was clear that he was struggling to build a majority and instead of doing something about it, what does he do? He strips down and starts doing naked suryanamaskars on the banks of river Cauvery.  Just when you thought it can't get more hilarious than this, surprise surprise. Yeddy pulls another trick out of his hat.

This happened just last week when Yeddy wrote an open letter to HDK and published it in the newspapers. In simple words, the letter challenged HDK to swear infront on Lord Manjunatheshwara in Dharmasthala that there was truth behind his allegations. It so reminded me of school kids challenging each other using mother promise or father promise, only in this case it was "God Promise". Amidst all this drama, whenever you see Yeddy and his men, you'll always see them posing to the camera with a victory sign. I'm so sure atleast 90% of them don't even have an idea of what it is and when it is to be used.

With everything said an done, I really want Yeddy to stay put and entertain us with his antics day in day out. After all people like George W Bush and Yeddy are rare and one has to make the best use out of them. Comedians like these don't crop up every other day.

P.S - Hope to wake up tomorrow and see another "Yeddy" in my Twitter stream.

Tweet

2010: The year that wasn't, was and never will be

Its that time of the year when everyone is either coming up with resolutions or trying their best to avoid them. Either way, they are bound to be unsuccessful. The best way to cope with this is to come up with a resolution a month or two before the D-day and blissfully break it on that day. This way, the countdown looks more like a countdown to break the shackles rather than to get bound by them.

2010 has actually been a very controversial year even if you exclude my sting operation to prove the eternal lust turned love between David Cameron and Nick Clegg.

The British media couldn't blame it on the direction and speed of the wind and the sound of vuvuzelas and had to stick to Green for their Worldcup miseries. Probably was the best year for the England cricket team. The nicotine patches had changed into purple and with successes in the T20 Worldcup and the Ashes, it was probably their best chance of stealing the thunder away from football. After Afridi's hunger for white balls, the immature spot-fixing trio proved that men are bad at "faking it".

Assange and his uncontrollable leaks not only made matters worse for Uncle Sam but helped various sanitary brands to plug the leaks. Really love some of the mirrors on which Wiki Leaks is hosted http://213.251.145.96/Mirrors.html. The #Barkhagate controversy was the Indian vesion of Wiki Leaks.

Until October, Kalmadi was just a regular bearded guy wearing running shoes with formal pants. The money laundering and CWG scams where he paid more money for a rented Z-grade equipment than for a A-grade new one launched him to a totally untouchable level. Not because he couldn't be touched but because he was hiding under Soniaji's saree. Inspite of delivering the most 'booooo'ed speech at the opening ceremony and also partnering with Shera to flounder a share of this and a share of that, the man's style remained impeccably simple with the same aforementioned attire. For a guy who had looted so much of the tax payers' money that he could actually buy Armani, Gucci, Hugo Boss and still have spare change, he chose to wear the same clothes as the masons and proved that he was a simpleton.

It was a year when Tendulkar turned 37 and hit the best form of his life (Right, like we haven't heard that before). While millions were bowing down to the little master's achievements, Arun Lal and Sanjay Manjrekar were busy discussing the fact that Sachin's backlift has reduced by 1.2cms over these years and he has gained 2 pounds over the last year which in turn has helped him to set new records. Arun Lal also claimed on air that he had presented this magic formula to Sachin on his birthday but honorably requested  his identity to be kept anonymous.

While the politicians in Karnataka were too busy playing polistrip poker, with the only twist being not taking off their clothes but of their most beloved politicians from the opposite party. As the whole world witnessed politicians showing off their bare chests in the assembly, none of them even bothered about the more boiling issues of the state. When a severe shortage of vegetables occurred at the end of the year, the state government started blaming the central government and vice versa with CM Yeddy's solution being to set the record for the most number of temples visited in a week, yet again. The act required him to abstain from all possible activities that involved his libido. But he seemed to listen to 50 Cent's candy shop a lot and couldn't get past the line "Ill melt in your mouth girl, not in your hand".

To round it all up. I wish everyone a very depressing, stale and a crappy new year. Hope I have motivated all of you to prove me wrong and perform miracles this year.

Would love to read any interesting 31st night experiences in the comments section below. My indulgence on Absinth has made me wonder whether the whole party was probably a hallucination or not.

Tweet