Its that time of the year when everyone is either coming up with resolutions or trying their best to avoid them. Either way, they are bound to be unsuccessful. The best way to cope with this is to come up with a resolution a month or two before the D-day and blissfully break it on that day. This way, the countdown looks more like a countdown to break the shackles rather than to get bound by them.
2010 has actually been a very controversial year even if you exclude my sting operation to prove the eternal lust turned love between David Cameron and Nick Clegg.
The British media couldn't blame it on the direction and speed of the wind and the sound of vuvuzelas and had to stick to Green for their Worldcup miseries. Probably was the best year for the England cricket team. The nicotine patches had changed into purple and with successes in the T20 Worldcup and the Ashes, it was probably their best chance of stealing the thunder away from football. After Afridi's hunger for white balls, the immature spot-fixing trio proved that men are bad at "faking it".
Assange and his uncontrollable leaks not only made matters worse for Uncle Sam but helped various sanitary brands to plug the leaks. Really love some of the mirrors on which Wiki Leaks is hosted http://213.251.145.96/Mirrors.html. The #Barkhagate controversy was the Indian vesion of Wiki Leaks.Until October, Kalmadi was just a regular bearded guy wearing running shoes with formal pants. The money laundering and CWG scams where he paid more money for a rented Z-grade equipment than for a A-grade new one launched him to a totally untouchable level. Not because he couldn't be touched but because he was hiding under Soniaji's saree. Inspite of delivering the most 'booooo'ed speech at the opening ceremony and also partnering with Shera to flounder a share of this and a share of that, the man's style remained impeccably simple with the same aforementioned attire. For a guy who had looted so much of the tax payers' money that he could actually buy Armani, Gucci, Hugo Boss and still have spare change, he chose to wear the same clothes as the masons and proved that he was a simpleton.
It was a year when Tendulkar turned 37 and hit the best form of his life (Right, like we haven't heard that before). While millions were bowing down to the little master's achievements, Arun Lal and Sanjay Manjrekar were busy discussing the fact that Sachin's backlift has reduced by 1.2cms over these years and he has gained 2 pounds over the last year which in turn has helped him to set new records. Arun Lal also claimed on air that he had presented this magic formula to Sachin on his birthday but honorably requested his identity to be kept anonymous.
While the politicians in Karnataka were too busy playing polistrip poker, with the only twist being not taking off their clothes but of their most beloved politicians from the opposite party. As the whole world witnessed politicians showing off their bare chests in the assembly, none of them even bothered about the more boiling issues of the state. When a severe shortage of vegetables occurred at the end of the year, the state government started blaming the central government and vice versa with CM Yeddy's solution being to set the record for the most number of temples visited in a week, yet again. The act required him to abstain from all possible activities that involved his libido. But he seemed to listen to 50 Cent's candy shop a lot and couldn't get past the line "Ill melt in your mouth girl, not in your hand".
To round it all up. I wish everyone a very depressing, stale and a crappy new year. Hope I have motivated all of you to prove me wrong and perform miracles this year.
Would love to read any interesting 31st night experiences in the comments section below. My indulgence on Absinth has made me wonder whether the whole party was probably a hallucination or not.
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